Helping Your Baby Sleep Through the Night: Tips for Parents
One of the most challenging aspects of parenthood is managing your baby’s sleep schedule, especially during those restless nights. While it’s entirely normal for babies to wake up at night, there are strategies that can help you and your baby get a good night’s sleep. Here are some tips to encourage your baby to sleep through the night. Helping your baby sleep through the night is a common goal for many parents. While it may take time and patience, there are strategies you can implement to encourage longer, uninterrupted sleep.
Getting back to your baby sleeping through the night is a general challenge among parents. As a newborn, babies need to wake every few hours to feed since their tiny tummies aren’t big enough to keep them full throughout the night. However, as your baby grows they need those nighttime feedings less. This is usually when parents expect their babies to start sleeping through the night, but things don’t always turn out as expected, leaving parents utterly exhausted and searching for solutions.
How to Sleep Train Your Baby
Here are some tips to encourage your baby to sleep through the night.
1. Establish a bedtime routine.
It’s never too early to get a bedtime routine started. Your bedtime routine should be simple and sustainable, so it’s easy for you to do it every night. Even the smallest change in your baby’s routine can leave them feeling off, and suddenly waking more frequently at night. Include calming, soothing activities that your baby seems to respond to, like swaddling and shushing. The bedtime routine can be where you create positive sleep associations for your baby.
2. Teach your baby to self-soothe, which means trying your best to soothe them less.
When your baby wakes in the middle of the night and cries for you, it’s always okay to go check on them. However, try and limit your time in there with them. Make it clear that it’s still time to baby sleep, not play or eat. Place your hand on their chest for a few moments to calm them, then leave the room (making sure to place your baby on their back to avoid sudden infant death syndrome). It makes your baby feel like you’re still there. This can help ease separation anxiety, break the sleep association to be held to fall back asleep and help your baby learn to self-soothe.
3. Start weaning the night feedings.
Once you get the okay from your doctor to stop night feedings, you should slowly start to reduce them. In many cases, feeding becomes a sleep association because you feed your baby every time they wake up. Just because that’s no longer necessary, doesn’t mean your baby won’t want it anymore. Slowly wean them off the night feedings (maybe try a dream feed?), feeding them less and not as frequently over a few days or a week to get them used to not feeding every time they wake.
4. Follow a schedule.
Make sure your baby is getting the right amount of daytime sleep to prepare them to get the right amount of nighttime sleep. As newborns, babies can’t differentiate between day and night, they just sleep around the clock. As they get older, they start sleeping longer periods, the longest stretches being at night. If babies sleep too much during the day they won’t stay asleep as long at night. Take a look at our sample newborn sleep schedules for some suggested guidelines.
5. Keep a calming ambiance.
Ambiance can be everything! Keep the room at a comfortable temperature, make sure it stays dark, and even try adding some white noise in there! The softest of sounds can disturb your baby at night, the white noise will provide a consistent, soothing sound for them to fall asleep to, and it will drown out any other noises happening around the house.
6. Stick to an appropriate bedtime.
Putting your baby to sleep later in the hopes that they’ll sleep later in the morning most likely won’t work. If you’re following a schedule, it’s important to keep a regular bedtime for your little one to keep them on track and to help your baby sleep at more appropriate times. Remember, newborns don’t have a set bedtime, because they’re just sleeping whenever they need to. But around 3 months old, you can start to establish a healthy bedtime to accompany your sleep schedule.
7. Be patient.
If your baby was sleeping through the night on their own before, and suddenly stopped, it might be a sleep regression or growth spurt’s fault. Growth spurts usually only last a few days, and then your baby should return to normal patterns and be able to sleep for hours at a time. Baby sleep regressions, including the infamous 4-month sleep regression, usually last 1-4 weeks. Be patient during times like this and focus on the fact that it won’t last.
Baby Sleep Training: A 7-Day Method for Parents
Is it possible to get your baby sleep-trained in 7 days? Some experts say yes. Sleep training goals will be different for everyone, but strategies such as instituting a positive baby sleep routine and encouraging self-soothing could benefit both of you. And at the very least, you could learn some tips on getting your baby to sleep without being held. Here’s a seven-day, step-by-step routine for sleep training for your baby.
Day 1: Start a Regular Routine
Many babies get their days and nights mixed up, napping for long periods in the afternoon and waking up to play at bedtime. But our sleep training technique will fix that. “The latest research shows that infants can be taught the difference between night and day from the get-go,” says John Herman, PhD, clinical director of the Sleep Disorders Center at the Children’s Medical Center of Dallas. You simply need to provide the cues that allow this to happen. Here are some steps you can take:
- Wake your baby up early on day one.
- Try to rise at this same time every day.
- Position your baby’s crib near the window to let the natural light shine in. (Just be sure there aren’t any blinds or drapes that could pose a safety risk.)
“The natural light helps babies organize their circadian rhythms,” says Dr. Herman.5 Letting them nap with natural light can also promote this process. “If they wake from a nap in the daylight, they understand it’s time to get up. If they wake at night in the dark, they’ll learn to go back to sleep,” he explains.
At nighttime, begin some quiet rituals. “Decide on a specific bedtime routine,” says Claire Lerner, MSW., a child-development specialist at Zero To Three: The National Center for Infants, Toddlers, and Families, in Washington, D.C. Dress your child in their pajamas and put them down in their crib for the night with the lights out. Just prior to tucking them in, read an interesting story or sing a song, which helps your baby’s motor and sensory system slow down.
Day 2: Practice Makes Perfect
On day two, focus on building the consistent routine you began. If your child still requires nighttime feedings, it’s a good time to accentuate the difference between day and night, says Robert Ballard, MD, director of the Sleep Health Center at the National Jewish Medical Center, in Denver. “Keep night feedings very relaxing, with the lights low. Do everything you can to avoid stimulating your baby,” he says. “And during the day, make feedings a time of high activity, when you tickle their feet or sing songs, so they begin to perceive the difference.”
Pay careful attention to what soothes your baby in the evening too. “A bath may be calming for one child and invigorating for another,” says Lerner.
You might also want to try adding white noise, says Carl Johnson, Ph.D., a psychologist and pediatric sleep researcher at Central Michigan University, in Mount Pleasant. “The hum of a fan or air conditioner or a radio set on static works well for many infants. The good thing about white noise is that you can fade it out over time, once your baby begins to sleep more predictably.”
Day 3: Brace for a Few Tears
Steel yourself: Day three involves putting your child down in their crib while they’re still awake. “It’s the single most important thing you can do,” says Dr. Schaefer. “If they fall asleep at your breast during their bedtime feeding, for example, arouse them enough that their eyes are open when you place them in the crib.” Or even better, shift your baby’s bedtime feeding to the start of their bedtime routine. Of course, a little—or a lot—of crying may ensue. But rest assured, it will be tougher on you than on your baby.
Parents naturally find it agonizing to listen to their little one cry, but just keep reminding yourself that the end result—baby sleep!—will benefit the whole family. “Get over the worry that ignoring your baby while they cry will do psychological harm,” emphasizes Dr. Schaefer. If you’ve been meeting their every need in other ways, this situation certainly won’t lessen their sense of security.
If some nighttime tears do ensue, periodically check on your baby and reassure them that you’re there; aim for every three to five minutes the first night. But keep your visits brief: Don’t turn on the light, remove them from the crib, or offer them a pacifier or a bottle. “If they fall asleep with one of these crutches, they’ll cry for it again if they wake up or at bedtime tomorrow night,” says Lerner.
Day 4: Tough It Out
Day three was a long one. Expect an improvement on day four. Your baby will remember a little sooner that crying doesn’t produce results. When they protest, you can lengthen your response time to every ten minutes or stick with checking every few minutes. And whatever happens, don’t give in. “If you’re inconsistent, the baby learns to hold out—they’ll just up the ante and cry twice as long tomorrow night,” says Deborah Givan, MD, director of the Children’s Sleep Disorders Center at Riley Hospital for Children, in Indianapolis.
Day 5: The Baby Settles In
Most newborn babies get into the program in three to five days, so this could be your lucky night. If your child is still holding their own, you can lengthen your response time to 15 minutes, or stick to what you have been doing. “If you notice that you’re fueling your child’s reaction every time you go in and you can tolerate staying away, it’s fine to do so. Just peek at them through a crack in the door instead so they don’t actually see you.”
The other frequent problem at this point is night feedings. At about 3 to 4 months, most infants are ready to give them up—but you can’t just stop cold turkey with a younger baby. You can, however, keep them as brief and quiet as possible: Cuddle your baby but don’t sing to them, keep the lights out even during diaper changes, and settle them in the crib as soon as they’re done, even when they are awake.
Day 6: Baby Sleeps Through the Night
Sounds like bliss, doesn’t it? But chances are you’ll be wandering the halls a little anyway. You may find yourself getting up to check on the baby—but relax. Dress them in warm PJs if their room feels cold, and turn the monitor down so that you hear them only if they’re really in distress. Now that you’ve made so much progress, don’t wreck it by rushing in too quickly. Let your child soothe themself. You also need to relax so that you can fall asleep!
Day 7: You Sleep Soundly Too
Give yourself a big pat on the back. Not only have you regained your sleep, but you’ve given your baby an important gift: Good sleep habits are as critical as good hygiene to a child’s well-being. Of course, there will be setbacks, such as an illness, a new sibling, or an unfamiliar hotel room. “Even children who are good sleepers will have problems now and then,” says Dr. Givan. But fall back on our foolproof plan whenever the need arises. Your child will respond with even less difficulty the second time around because they already know the drill.
Why Won’t My Baby Sleep Through the Night?
Here are some of the reasons that your newborn won’t sleep:
Active Sleep: It’s possible that your newborn is sleeping more than you think. Newborns can be very active sleepers. They can be so active, in fact, that they may appear awake (moving around, making noises, etc.), even when they’re sleeping.
Hunger: Young babies will awaken in the night to eat. Small tummies need more frequent feedings. However, if your newborn is waking every hour during the night, it may be a sign that they need additional calories during the day.
Day-Night Confusion: It can be common for newborns to have their days and nights flipped. If your newborn seems to be sleeping all day and awake all night, we call this day-night confusion.
Comfort: Newborns are used to the cozy confines of the womb. Practicing safe swaddling helps your newborn feel secure and also calms the Moro reflex to allow for less disrupted sleep.
Physical Discomfort: As your newborn’s body is learning how to eat and digest, gas can sometimes make it hard to settle. Burping during and after feedings and using a pacifier can help. Food intolerances and reflux symptoms can also cause discomfort. If it feels like your baby is never calm or is always difficult to settle, I want you to talk with your pediatrician.
Sleep Strategies: Please know, that sleeping through the night is a learned skill that takes time and practice. Not sure where to begin? These strategies can help your baby learn to sleep through the night.
How Long Will Baby Sleep Training Take?
Every baby’s sleep training timeline will be different. But generally, once you start sleep training your baby, it doesn’t take long to stick. We outlined a seven-day method below, but you can find sleep training instructions for three or four nights too. Sleep training might take much longer than this if your baby isn’t ready for it. Consult your pediatrician if sleep training hasn’t “stuck” after two weeks.
5 Best Baby Sleep Training Methods
Choosing the best sleep training method for your family will depend on both personal preference and your baby’s temperament, so it may help to research the different options and speak with a healthcare provider before choosing one you feel will work best for you.
To help you narrow it down, here are five of the most popular sleep training methods.
- Fading method
With the fading sleep training method, parents rely on soothing techniques to help their baby fall asleep independently, “fading” out reliance on you to fall asleep. Some of the behaviors you may “fade” over time include feeding, rocking, or snuggling your baby to sleep. Over a while, you slowly “fade out” of whatever aspect of the nighttime routine that relies on you and gradually extend the independent time your baby spends falling asleep without you. Fading is considered a gentle sleep training method.
- Pick-up/put-down method
This pick-up, put-down sleep training method is a no-cry sleep training method. Pick up your baby whenever they cry, soothe them briefly, then put them back down, drowsy but awake. Repeat these steps until the little one falls asleep. The key is to gradually teach your child that you are close and they are safe, so they can fall asleep on their own. - Chair method
To start this sleep training method, the parent or caregiver sits on a chair near the crib until the baby falls asleep. They don’t use soothing techniques to calm crying or fussiness. Each night, they move the chair further away from the crib. For instance, on nights one to three, you might have your chair next to the crib, holding your baby’s hand or patting their back.
Then, on night four, you might scoot your chair a little bit away and stop the hand-holding. You may even need to do a few nights at the baby’s doorway or sitting in the hall, but eventually, by the end of the training, your baby should be able to fall asleep without you in the room at all.
- Cry it out method
After completing the bedtime routine, the parents leave the baby. They don’t respond to the baby’s cries throughout the night, letting them fall asleep without any assistance. There are different levels of the cry-it-out method, from only letting your baby cry for a short duration of time, to more extreme levels that involve not coming back in until morning, so you can customize this method to what is best for you. - Ferber method
Named for the physician who developed the method, the Ferber method calls for caregivers to put their baby down for sleep and respond to the baby’s cries at set time intervals that gradually increase each night. Advocates of the method say that the baby will eventually learn to self-soothe and fall asleep independently through “Ferberization.”
Remember that every baby is unique, and what works for one may not work for another. Be flexible in your approach and adapt to your baby’s changing needs. With patience, consistency, and a loving environment, you can help your baby establish healthy baby sleep habits and enjoy more restful nights for the whole family.
